Bulgaria Ski discussion board
OK - FRIDAY JOKE DAY
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posts : 13 (Beginner)Date : 11-24-06 13:35OK - FRIDAY JOKE DAY
Please keep 'em clean guys ........ I'll start them off.2 blondes walking down a country lane when one spots a gravestone at the side of the road.
BLIMEY she said, the bloke who is buried here was 117 when he died.
FLIPPIN 'ECK said her friend ..... what was his name?
The first blonde looked again and said ..........
MILES ....... FROM LONDON.
PP
Cleaned up FRIDAY JOKE DAY
Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men and he immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize.
"Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd let me," she told him.
"Oh, no, I'll be ...
"Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd let me," she told him.
"Oh, no, I'll be ...
Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men and he immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize.
"Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd let me," she told him.
"Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes," the man replied, still in pain, in the foetal position, still clasping his hands together in his groin.
But she persisted, and he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside. She began to massage him. She then asked, "How does that feel?"
He replied, "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."
"Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd let me," she told him.
"Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes," the man replied, still in pain, in the foetal position, still clasping his hands together in his groin.
But she persisted, and he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside. She began to massage him. She then asked, "How does that feel?"
He replied, "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."
re: OK - FRIDAY JOKE DAY
Several men are in the changing room of a golf club. A mobile phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free speaker- function and begins to talk....
Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: "Hello"
WOMAN: "Darling, it's me. Are you at the club?"
MAN: "Yes"
WOMAN: "I am at the shopping centre and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only £1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?"
MAN: "Sure go ahead if you like it that much."
WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes ...
Several men are in the changing room of a golf club. A mobile phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free speaker- function and begins to talk....
Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: "Hello"
WOMAN: "Darling, it's me. Are you at the club?"
MAN: "Yes"
WOMAN: "I am at the shopping centre and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only £1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?"
MAN: "Sure go ahead if you like it that much."
WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2006 model. I saw one I really liked."
MAN: "How much?"
WOMAN: "£50,000"
MAN: "OK, but for that price I want it with all the
options."
WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more thing ... The house I wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking £950,000"
MAN: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of £900,000. They will probably take it. If not, we can go the extra £50 thousand."
WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you so much!!"
MAN: "Bye! I love you, too."
The man hangs up. The other men in the changing room are staring at
him in astonishment, mouths agape.....
He smiles and asks..........................................
"Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
re: OK - FRIDAY JOKE DAY
man to wife-had a wet dream about you last nightwoman to husband-realy
man- yep you got hit by a bus and i peed myself laughing
re: OK - FRIDAY JOKE DAY
Drunk
Smile for a While: 23 November 2006, Thursday.
A drunk was staggering down the main street of town. Somehow, he managed to make it up the stairs to the cathedral and into the building, where he crashed from pew to pew. He finally made his way to a side aisle and into a confessional.
A priest had been observing the man's sorry progress. Figuring the fellow was in need of some assistance, he proceeded to enter his side of the confessional. His attention was rewarded only by a ...
Smile for a While: 23 November 2006, Thursday.
A drunk was staggering down the main street of town. Somehow, he managed to make it up the stairs to the cathedral and into the building, where he crashed from pew to pew. He finally made his way to a side aisle and into a confessional.
A priest had been observing the man's sorry progress. Figuring the fellow was in need of some assistance, he proceeded to enter his side of the confessional. His attention was rewarded only by a ...
Drunk
Smile for a While: 23 November 2006, Thursday.
A drunk was staggering down the main street of town. Somehow, he managed to make it up the stairs to the cathedral and into the building, where he crashed from pew to pew. He finally made his way to a side aisle and into a confessional.
A priest had been observing the man's sorry progress. Figuring the fellow was in need of some assistance, he proceeded to enter his side of the confessional. His attention was rewarded only by a lengthy silence.
Finally he asked, "May I help you, my son?" "I dunno." came the drunk's voice from behind the partition. "You got any toilet paper on your side?"
Smile for a While: 23 November 2006, Thursday.
A drunk was staggering down the main street of town. Somehow, he managed to make it up the stairs to the cathedral and into the building, where he crashed from pew to pew. He finally made his way to a side aisle and into a confessional.
A priest had been observing the man's sorry progress. Figuring the fellow was in need of some assistance, he proceeded to enter his side of the confessional. His attention was rewarded only by a lengthy silence.
Finally he asked, "May I help you, my son?" "I dunno." came the drunk's voice from behind the partition. "You got any toilet paper on your side?"
